It’s back to school season! Mixed feelings for everyone, and for first-year college students, this time of year can be especially emotion-inducing. Whether you’re feeling excited, nervous, or scared for this new step, life can feel overwhelming when you first enter college. From my experience, here are some tips to avoid some of the biggest freshman pitfalls.

#1: Cut the expectations

I recently heard a piece of advice that hit me hard. To put it in a way to revive our school time senses, here is a mathematical equation to keep in mind as you enter your new school year: happiness = reality – expectations.

Before I entered my first year, I hyped myself up by watching a bunch of school time movies. In the movies, school is always a magical place full of love and friendship and drama that always resolves itself in the 2-hour running time.

What they don’t choose to highlight are the less sparkly moments of college, like the homework, late-nighters, and uncertainty that can come from a new environment. College can be a great time, but it is not a movie set where everything just magically works itself out. So do yourself a favor, and try to go into the year with a realistic mindset.

#2: Take care of your health, physically and mentally

The freshman fifteen is a thing. The weight gain isn’t as much of a concern as creating unhealthy habits is. The fact of the matter is, that unless you make a conscious decision not to, you will eat more your freshman year. With all of the free food that can be found around campus, it can be hard not to. Especially if you’re up at 2 am and that free offer of pizza suddenly sounds sooo good. My personal favorite late-night snack was sweet potato fries and a double chocolate cookie. Definitely not the healthiest. Giving into unhealthy cravings is fine every few days, just not every day. After a while, you realize that you really don’t need that Chick-fil-a at 12 o’clock at night.

The key is to set realisitc health expectations for yourself. If you exercised frequently in high school, keep it up in college. If you didn’t exercise in high school (because I definitely did not), then consider starting, or at least make sure you’re getting that exercise in on your long walks to class! Truthfully, I didn’t step foot in the gym once my whole freshman year, but those walks to class definitely do help to get exercise in!

As for mentally, make sure you’re taking time for yourself so that you don’t burn out. When you’re tired, you don’t have to go out to that party on the weekend. You could stay in with your friends, pop some popcorn, and watch a movie! Or if you just need some alone time, put on a face mask and watch that movie by yourself!

Never feel guilty for needing to take a break. That’s the trap I fell into. I’d feel so guilty while taking a break that I’d feel like I needed another break just to recover from the break I just took!

Yep, it was pretty problematic, but I realized I wasn’t the only one that felt that way. We have become so conditioned to always be doing SOMETHING, whether it be scrolling through our phones or being productive. Get comfortable with having some quiet time with yourself to just take a breath and calm down. Find what you need and like to do to feel relaxed and avoid burnout. It’s all about making sure you stay charged up physically, socially, and emotionally.

#3: Never forget who you are

I thought about this one while I was at a theater watching Crazy Rich Asians with my friends. It was at the part where Nick’s mom said something along the lines of, children forget who they are when they’re away from home for too long. It was such a small moment in the movie, but my emotionally drained self was sitting in the theater for the rest of the movie like

I mean, I also cried during both wedding scenes, so that movie was just a real roller coaster of emotions for me (great movie, 10/10 do recommend). In college, you get so busy that sometimes you forget what your priorities are. What you believe, what you stand for. So I recommend writing a letter to yourself. Something you can go back to when you find yourself treading through a grey area: where you stand on religion, sex, drinking, work-life balance, partying, etc. It’s good to remind yourself what you believe.

Also, talk to your family! Don’t completely ice them out! It can be great to hear from home and remind yourself of where you come from now that you’re in a completely new environment.

#4: Don’t get too caught up in plans for the future

I spent a LOT of time trying to plan and see into the future my freshman year. It mostly came out of a concern about my major. First, I didn’t know whether I should be an engineering computer science major or an arts and science computer science major. Small distinction, but it would determine whether I would have to take the engineering pre-reqs (physics, chemistry, etc.) or just the general liberal arts distribution requirements (the pre-reqs were pretty killer, let me tell you).

This AB vs. BSE debate turned into whether I even wanted to be a computer science major in the first place. For a week, I was convinced that I was going to become an English major. I had even planned out all the courses for the next 3 years I would be in college for each potential major paths. I was being way too extra. I was so concerned with my major and potential jobs after graduation that I was taking mental energy away from my school work, and my grades suffered because of it.

Don’t feel like now that you’re in college, you suddenly have to have every step of your life figured out. Focus on the present and doing what you love and are interested in, and things will work themselves out. I’m still uncertain about my major, but I have decided to trust God with my future and focus more on my present.

#5: Focus less on your love life

This goes along with the whole life-is-not-a-movie thing. Sure, there may be a couple of cute guys on your hall or in your classroom, but that doesn’t mean you are meant to be together. I learned this lesson after a post-birthday meltdown when my crush forgot to wish me a happy birthday.

Yep, not my finest moment. Freshman year should be about you and setting yourself up for success for the rest of college. So don’t let any crush stand in your way and distract you. Trust me, it’s not worth it.

#6: Talk it out

I am a HUGE overthinker. It’s so easy for me to get trapped in my head over small decisions. I found that talking to people who understand what you’re going through can be really helpful. I don’t think I would have stuck out my second-semester physics class if I hadn’t talked to my professor after class one day. She encouraged me and gave me tips I could use to do better in class (having a professor you can actually talk to is a great thing to think about when deciding on classes).

So whether it’s a family member, professor, upperclassmen, or friend that you go to, talk through your thought process. Once a decision has been externalized, it can take a lot of the stress out.

#7: You actually have to hang out with people to make friends

In high school, you make friends mostly out of convenience. You see the same people almost every day, so you end up making friends without too much effort.

In college, you only meet up a couple of times a week for most classes. Even if you share a major with someone, it’s not guaranteed that you’ll see them all the time since everyone’s schedule is so different.

So in order to make and maintain friendships, you have to be purposeful. Start a study group with classmates in the first semester. They can help with school work (as long as the group isn’t too overly talkative) and give you people to hang out with outside of class, which is great to have in the first couple weeks of school when you feel like you know absolutely no one.

You also want to make sure you are meeting up with people outside of an academic context. Invite some classmates to lunch with you before or after class. Make plans to hang out with people in the evening or on the weekends, after you’ve finished your work of course.

Realize that everyone is looking for friends in college, so as long as you stay friendly and open, you will find people to talk to. It also takes time to find a good friend group. I feel like I didn’t really get to know people until midway through spring semester, and that’s okay. Giving yourself the time to adjust to your new environment. That way, you’ll learn more about yourself and what you are looking for in your friends.

#8: Re-evaluate your study practices

In highschool, procrasitantion was the way to go. I mean, it shouldn’t have been, but I always got away with it, so I kept doing it. Somehow, even when I had three different projects due in a two-day span, and I hadn’t started at all the day before the first two were due, I still managed to get everything done. My procrastination in high school reached superpower levels (and increased my stress levels too).

In college, though, procrastination really doesn’t fly. With all of the other job, club, and self-care commitments, if you procrastinate, work may just not get done. The key is to stay organized. Buy a physical planner (because studies show that writing your goals down makes you more likely to accomplish them) and consistently use it. Schedule in more time than you need to complete a task if you feel like you’re going to procrastinate. I found that working on something for at least 15 minutes one day is better than not working on it at all.

Also, if you find that you’re studying hard and you’re still not getting the grades you want, re-evaluate. Talk to your professors to see where you can get help or boost your grade. Getting good grades in college requires you to stay on top of your game, even more than you were in high school.

Those are all the tips I wish I knew the summer before freshman year! I was going to include packing light, but I think overpacking is part of the fun naivety of freshman year. Freshman year of college can be rough for anyone, but if you take care of yourself and stay vigilant, you can get through it relatively unscathed. There will always be bumps in the road, but that’s supposed to be what makes life interesting, right? Now, go and flourish in college; have a great first year!

Sincerely,

Lindsey